![]() I would also compare this to going on holiday, in that what can seem idyllic and do-able for a few weeks or even a few months, is not necessarily how you’d like to live long term. It’s great that you enjoy life without him when he is away for work, it’s not a negative thing.” Perkins continued: “You like that feeling of empowerment. It’s OK for him not to be your “everything” – really, who is? Just because you cope without him there for periods of time, doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with your relationship or that he is surplus to requirements. Imagine if you fell apart when he went away. Mo Perkins, a psychotherapist who deals with families and couples ( .uk), also had this to say: “It’s almost as if you think there’s something wrong with being OK while your partner’s away, but it’s a sign of maturity, that you can enjoy life without him.” I also wondered how you would feel if your partner had written in such a letter to me, about you? If they were, how would anybody get anything done? They are not like the love of adolescence where everything seems so exciting you can’t eat or sleep. I don’t want to press you to stay in a relationship you don’t think is right for you but real, grown-up relationships, especially where there are children, can take work. How can I find the freedom and happiness I’ve known during the last couple of weeks once my partner returns? I think a new dynamic is required but I don’t know what or how. However, my personal fulfilment comes from my children, friends and work rather than my relationship. Much of the time when he’s around, our unit of four feels right and we have good times. I emphatically don’t want to do that to the children either. I don’t necessarily want to split up and I don’t want to meet anyone else, as both these actions would destroy my partner. I feel terrible that I can’t say the same. My partner says the children and I are everything to him, and I believe him. My younger son doesn’t quite understand the time-frame of his dad’s trip, so while he asks every few days where he is, he seems mostly happy and himself. He says he doesn’t miss his dad but is looking forward to seeing him again. They love their dad but he and my elder son often argue, which affects my son badly. She sings the lyrics into the phone conversationally, looking somber and almost numb, disconnected.People have said how relaxed and happy I seem and the kids are the same. In the first part, Eilish lounges in a lush pink apartment in a T-shirt and sweatpants, talking on the phone. The music video adds to the storyĪccompanying the “two-act” style song is a similarly binary music video, aligning with the song's emotional shifts. Eilish sings, "Never paid any mind to my mother or friends, so I / Shut ‘em all out for you ‘cause I was a kid." Adams, 24, is five years older than Eilish. ![]() The song may also reference the couple's age difference. Then, in the second part of the song, Eilish sings about drunk driving: “You called me again, drunk in your Benz / Driving home under the influence / You scared me to death, but I’m wasting my breath.” "I feel like you don’t take me seriously when I say that. In the documentary, Eilish is seen fighting with Adams and reprimanding him for driving drunk. “I was just like ‘Dude, you don’t even have enough love to love yourself, you can’t love me.’” “There was just a lack of effort, I think,” Eilish says of the relationships in the Apple+ documentary. These lyrics are also reflected in words Eilish uses in the documentary. Other lyrics show disinterest from one side of the relationship: “Do you read my interviews? Or do you skip my avenue? / When you said you were passing through, was I even on your way? / I knew when I asked you to be cool about what I was telling you / You’d do the opposite of what you said you’d do.” She adds, “I’m just not happy.” Billie Eilish/ Youtube “I just, like, spent time away from him for a little bit and I was like ‘Wow, I’m missing so much because I’m like, worried about you all the time,” Eilish says. The song’s opening lines, “When I’m away from you / I’m happier than ever,” may reference the singer’s relationship with rapper and ex-boyfriend Brandon Adams, whose stage name is 7:AMP.Įilish first spoke about their relationship in her 2021 documentary “Billie Eilish: The World’s a Little Blurry," referring to him as "Q." In the documentary, she speaks to a friend about the strains on her relationship, and uses a phrase that echo the song's opening. Why the change? The song tracks the emotions surrounding a break-up, which may be rooted in Eilish's real experiences.
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